Angela’s Thoughts

Last Sunday, our church embarked on a program called 40 Days of Fire. Already in one week we have seen some amazing things happening. I just want to recap on a few of those so that I don’t forget them!

Aunt Debbie had another stroke 2 weeks ago, she is now in a home were she can receive the therapy and treatment she needs to get better. Pastor visited with her on Thursday, and at that time, she still had no feeling in her left side. The doctors have told her that she will not regain use of her left side again. But as Pastor began to pray for her, she started to say, “Ow, Ow”… she was feeling pain in her left leg. Her smile is beginning to lift on the left side. Our God is able!!!! Also, there is a sweet lady, named Marge, who is Aunt Debbie’s roommate. Pastor prayed with her as well, we are expecting God to work in her and her husband’s lives while Debbie is there.

A lady that was visiting our church, came and decided to take on the 40 Days of Fire challenge. She has had difficulty being able to go to sleep at night without the help of medication for a long time. She told the friend that invited her the next day at work that, she read Acts 1 and fell asleep afterward and slept peacefully all night. This has continued as she is reading the Bible before she is going to bed. She is excited about what God is doing in her!!!

Little Kevin (7 years old), the grandson of a lady that attends our church was dedicated last week at a church in another city. It is one that doesn’t baptized in Jesus Name. But after Kevin was dedicated, he told his mom that he wasn’t done yet. He proceeded to take off his shoes and tell them that he needed to be baptized. He got into the water and told the minister that he had to be baptized in Jesus Name. So the minister baptized him in Jesus Name. His great grandma, uncle and brother were also baptized in the precious name of Jesus. Since then, Kevin has had such a change in his life. Family is recognizing that something is different about him… We are waiting to hear more good reports from this family.

Those are just a few of the testimonies of what God is doing during this 40 day Fire walk! I’m excited to hear more and post as we get more news.

Today, at our leadership training meeting… Pastor had already told me that he was going to do a short lesson but really felt that we needed to just pray after that. Turn the session into an all out prayer meeting. Well, God acted before he even got to his lesson. We were talking about these miracles that God is doing in and through our church. The excitement was rising, and before you know it we were in that all out prayer meeting. The Lord spoke to us through tongues and interpretation. He said (in part), “You are afraid of pain, You are afraid of persecution, but look at me. I am your God. I want to take you deeper. I want to take you to another level. I will lead you. (to basically allow Him to cut away any ties that we have that aren’t of Him) to follow me.” It was beautiful. Hearing each person in that room feeling the weight of souls and feeling that call to intercession, sacrifice and boldness in Him.

After Pastor asked if anyone had anything else to add… what they might feel God is speaking to them, or to everyone. Bro. Rod talked of how right before Pastor began to interpret he saw a vision. No words… just a vision of sand, then rocky road and then pavement. As Pastor started speaking of “I want to take you deeper, I will lead you, follow me,” Bro. Rod felt that the sand was where some may be. It is hard to walk through sand, then some were on the rocky road where it is easy to slip and sprain an ankle, but how that God wants to lead us to that pavement. This is the path he wants to lead us to. Completely trusting Him…

Whoo… I get chills just thinking about it. God is so awesome! He loves us so deeply and completely. That He would come in our midst and minister to our lives. Each person getting something for themselves out of the same message… out of the same prayer meeting. He is personal and knows where each of us are. How awesome and beautiful is that? Amazing Love!

Well, I must get ready for church, but I believe that great things are in order for our service tonight! I want complete healing in my body… but if not, then He is still God! He is still able!!! I am in His hands! (Aren’t we all, really?)

While so very excited about what God did yesterday in our service. Seeing many that entered our doors for the first time… Seeing arms outstretched and lives being changed… Today, my heart is so heavy. Heavy with the burden for souls. Souls that have walked through doors of churches and have not returned again. Souls that are afraid of commitment. Souls that are undecided as to what is Truth, or accepting that there is a Truth. Souls that are seeking… desiring that someone will show them the way. Souls that are hurting from past failures. Souls that are struggling even though they seem fine… within them there is a battle warring. Souls… even my own, that are asking… What more can I do?

I feel such an urgency… but at the same time a loss at what steps to take because there is so much to do, and so little time. I am amazed that at such a wonderful time of year, a time to worship the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords… that people seem to forget so much. They become so engrossed in the trimmings and trappings of the Holiday… Oh, Where is Christ?

My Jesus, I can’t live without You! I am awed at Your very presence that You allow us to dwell in… It brings desire and dreams rising to the surface, prompting me to move… to do… something! Lord, I pray that I can be all the I need to be for You. I pray that my life reflects You. I pray that those who are seeking will find You. Lord, I pray that the deception that many live with will fall as scales from their eyes… Let them see Truth. Let them desire You. Stir them to the deepest part of their heart. Oh, God! Let us desire after You, Your ways… Your will. And let us not be so caught up in the life around us that we forget the real meaning of this celebration.

What more can I do? Show me! Change my desires if they aren’t after You. Make me to wake up early to fall to my knees and seek Your face. Keep me constantly checking my spirit… and aligning myself with You. Lord, You are ALL I need. You! Jesus!

“I believe in the Big Bang theory; however, my definition of Big Bang is that when God spoke the words “Let There Be…”- His voice thundered time, space and light into existence in the combination we know as the Universe; the reverberation of that echo is what astronomers know as the cosmic microwave background.

And that , my friends, if you read all three of my status updates… is why God is awesome and we are just pretenders of greatness. Sure we are “echoes” of eden but…our Father is the source I love science and that it keeps pointing back to the God of Wonders.” - Julia Bucy, Facebook status updates.

I too love science and how time and again… it keeps proving that there is a God beyond our comprehension.  I’m fine with there being unanswered questions… His ways are higher than ours?  Would you really want to serve a God that you understood EVERYTHING about Him?  If so… where is the FAITH in that? 

Miracles happen because of FAITH and because of a God who will work in ways beyond our understanding!  For example, I had a cyst, it was surgically removed, and then it appeared again… my husband and I prayed that God would heal me because I did not want to face another painful surgery.   After we finished praying, we looked again, and my scar had just grew about 1/2 inch to an inch longer and the cyst was gone.  Do I need to understand how it happened?  No!  But it happened and I am thankful!  And to think, the God that created the heavens and the earth… also takes time to listen to my requests. 

I think I would rather live by FAITH and continue to watch what marvelous things my God will do! 

This was written about 5 years ago for our Mother’s Day Service.  Each year, my husband has me speak.  (This version is long, but I wanted to keep all my notes… this was an easy way to do it.)

Hands of my daughter, myself, my mother and Mamaw.

Hands - What comes to mind, when you think about hands?  The things that came to my mind were… gentle, soft/rough, soothing, reassuring, caring, loving, blessing, understanding, … hurting, discipline, and release.

I have so many memories.  My Mamaw is a beautiful “Lady”… in the fullest sense of the word.  I remember riding in the car with her and Papaw.  I was the smallest so I would end up in the middle of them in the front seat.  If Papaw’s driving seemed reckless to her in any way, she would grab my leg, with her hand and squeeze.  I remember fighting with others about who sat in the front seat… I didn’t want my leg to have nails dug into it.  :(  But it is a memory that will always stick with me.

Mamaw wore dress gloves on her hands for as long as I can remember.  She loved hats, gloves, purses and shoes.  They were part of her “signature” dress, if you will.  Anyone you talk to that ever knew her, would say something about her appearance.

What makes hands beautiful?  Close your eyes and think of someone close to you… your mother, a loved one.  Can you see their hands?  Isn’t it amazing that you know what their hands look like?  It is not so much that they look beautiful, but it is because of what they represent to you that they ARE beautiful.

Now, think about what it is that makes them beautiful to you.  What have they done for you?  How have they touched you?

My Mother’s hands are beautiful to me.  Besides all the motherly things they represent, my mother’s hands are beautiful praying hands.  I remember one day when I was sick in bed, wasn’t able to go to school.  I was in a lot of pain.  Mamaw happened to be there, and her and my mother came in the room, laid hands on me and prayed for me.  It wasn’t a sweet little prayer, it was intercession.  These two women KNOW how to pray.

We had a little guest room.  It had a twin bed, a sewing machine and a chair.  I would hear my mother praying behind that closed door.  Often.  Daily.  She knew where to take her problems, and she knew personally the God that she served.  Every morning (unless she was out of town), while I was in school, my mother would pray with me before I walked out the door.  She or my dad would also pray with me, every night before I went to bed.  What an example!

My mother’s hands were there for me in two of my most difficult moments.  First when my daughter, Kelsea, was born.

Mamaw and Kelsea's hands

My mom was right beside me and when they lost Kelsea’s heart beat… my mom was there to pray.  Second, was in 2003, when I was in the hospital.  I remember holding my mom’s hand as she sat beside my bed… praying for me.  One evening, while I was staying at their house after coming home from the hospital, I was sitting on the bed, with her beside me praying until I got through to what I needed.  Not by words, but by what I saw… through her actions, my mother has shown me how important it is to pray.

Now you ask… What does praying really have anything to do with our hands?  Most of us don’t even fold our hands when we pray, but we lift them up in praise and we clap them in worship.  This is where Proverbs 3:27 comes in for me… “Withhold not good to them to whom it is due, when it is in the power of thine hand to do it.”

Dear Lord, it’s such a hectic day,
With little time to stop and pray,
For life’s been anything but calm
Since You called me to be a MOM.

Running errands, matching socks,
Building dreams with wooden blocks,
Cooking, cleaning, finding shoes
And other stuff the children lose.

Fitting lids on bottled bugs,
Wiping tears and giving hugs,
A stack of last week’s mail to read
So where’s the quiet time I need?

Yet, when I steal a moment, Lord,
Just at the sink or ironing board,
To ask the blessings of Your grace,
I see then, in my small one’s face,
That you have blessed me all the while
And I stoop to kiss that precious smile - Author Unknown.

We hold the most precious gift in our hands… physical as well as spiritual hands.  Think about this… It is within our power to either withhold it or give it. Hands often express how we are feeling - open and receiving or pushing away.

I believe the most beautiful hands are praying hands. If we could just see the wonderful things we could bestow on those around us.

• Matthew 7:7 says that we should ask, seek and knock
• James 5:16 says “The prayer of a righteous man is effective and powerful.”
• I John 5:15 says that we should pray for those that are committing sin.
• Matthew 21:22 says “If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer.”
• John 15:7 says “If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you.”

This is only a sampling of the open-ended promises about the effectiveness of prayer.  Prayers of blessings, prayers of protection and healing, prayers for leading and guidance for their lives, God’s will that none should perish, prayers of Salvation.  Prayer changes lives!

It doesn’t just affect those around us!  The more we pray the closer we get to God.  Remember closing your eyes and thinking of a loved ones hands?  In John 20, Jesus had appeared to the disciples, but Thomas had not yet seen him until verse 27 - Then saidth he to Thomas, Reach hither thy finger, and behold my hands… and be not faithless, but believing. 28 - And Thomas answered and said unto him, My Lord and my God. As we get closer to God, we will no longer see His hands as scarred and bloody, but they will become beautiful as we recognize that He is Lord and God as Thomas stated.

Prayer changes lives.  My mother still prays for me.  I am so thankful for that.  But, I feel I can’t express to you enough how important it is to have your own prayer life. I would beg you to put a goal in your mind… to change this world…starting with YOU.

• Set aside time to pray, start out small each day, then you will see that it grows.
• When you don’t have the desire to do it, pray for the desire.
• When you don’t believe, pray for your faith to grow.
• Be sincere and honest before God.  He already knows how you are feeling and what you are going through.

And once you make your way to Him, He will also see in you beautiful hands, beautiful because they are:

• Blessing Him.
• Creating a relationship with Him.
• Caring about how He feels.
• Becoming willing to be used for whatever service He need of.

Poem…

The things I never told you I’d like to tell you now;
Of feelings held contentedly inside my heart to swell;
Of thoughts and dreams, wants and happiness too;
A Mother’s prayer to finally share with you.

Lord, govern their lives as you have mine,
Touch them with Your sweet divine,
Make them happy, guide their paths,
Tickle their funnybones, let me hear their laughs.

Dry the tears sliding down their faces,
Hold their hands when the love heart races,
Make them stand tall when the burdens are great,
Prepare them to carry the loads of fate.

Heal the hurts and sufferings of their spirit,
Make them listen until they hear it;
That sweet song of yours that will touch their soul
And carry them forward until they are old.

Lord, let them see the meaning of life,
Protect them from the evils of strife,
Gently guide them in the path of your ways,
I pray, Lord, I pray for them everyday.

I know, Lord, that I fell short many times.
In my guidance as “Mom” there were crimes,
Times that I failed to help them see
The beauty that you have bestowed around me.

Please make things right, Lord, once again,
To help them to see the meaning of friend
And loved ones that hold them close to the heart
With a Mother that loves them, never apart. - Author Unknown.

More than anything in my life… I want my daughter to think of me when she is my age, as I think of my mother… as having beautiful PRAYING hands.  To know I did everything I could by prayer and intercession, when there is nothing else to do… I want to pray!

Excuse my ramblings… but some times I just need to speak out! 

Lately, I feel like I have been fighting for my life.  It feels like every side is being pushed, prodded, and sanded - to smooth those rough corners.  There seems to be so much happening, so many needs - urgent needs - all at one time… how can I possibly be there for everyone?   I can’t.  Unfortunately, there may be expectations that would be placed upon me to do and be what I can not be.  But I can pray!  I can be there spiritually!  I can walk in Faith in my prayers and request that God meet these needs and intercede on their behalf.

Because of the chaotic ground shaking situations that have come my way.. and to those around me, I see miracles are about to break forth!  We just need to stand firm.  We just need to keep our focus on the goal and not the circumstances and issues that surround us until we get to the goal.  We just need to be persistent… show our true desires to God, and allow Him to be God!

I don’t profess to be a prophetess, but there are signs that follow those who believe (Mark16:16-18).

¹⁶He that believeth and is baptized shall be saved; but he that believeth not shall be damned.

¹⁷And these signs shall follow them that believe; In my name shall they cast out devils; they shall speak with new tongues;

¹⁸They shall take up serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them; they shall lay hands on the sick, and they shall recover.

They SHALL…

I believe… with every part of me, I have been baptized… I trust and know my God.

They SHALL.  :)   Puts a smile on your face, doesn’t it?  It does mine.

What is following you?

Me?  I’m ready for those miracles to break forth… to bring God glory and honor.  To reach souls through the testimonies of the saints… He heals!  I am living proof!  I should not be here, I should have died in 2003.  :)  But I’m still here!!!!!  I am a walking, living, breathing testimony of the healing power of God.  Only by His Name, only by His grace and mercy!  I am still here.

Amplified Version.

¹BUT AS to the suitable times and the precise seasons and dates, brethren, you have no necessity for anything being written to you.

²For you yourselves know perfectly well that the day of the [return of the] Lord will come [as unexpectedly and suddenly] as a thief in the night.

³When people are saying, All is well and secure, and, There is peace and safety, then in a moment unforeseen destruction (ruin and death) will come upon them as suddenly as labor pains come upon a woman with child; and they shall by no means escape, for there will be no escape.

⁴But you are not in [given up to the power of] darkness, brethren, for that day to overtake you by surprise like a thief.

⁵For you are all sons of light and sons of the day; we do not belong either to the night or to darkness.

⁶Accordingly then, let us not sleep, as the rest do, but let us keep wide awake (alert, watchful, cautious, and on our guard) and let us be sober (calm, collected, and circumspect).

⁷For those who sleep, sleep at night, and those who are drunk, get drunk at night.

⁸But we belong to the day; therefore, let us be sober and put on the breastplate (corslet) of faith and love and for a helmet the hope of salvation.

⁹For God has not appointed us to [incur His] wrath [He did not select us to condemn us], but [that we might] obtain [His] salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ (the Messiah)

¹⁰Who died for us so that whether we are still alive or are dead [at Christ's appearing], we might live together with Him and share His life.

¹¹Therefore encourage (admonish, exhort) one another and edify (strengthen and build up) one another, just as you are doing.

¹²Now also we beseech you, brethren, get to know those who labor among you [recognize them for what they are, acknowledge and appreciate and respect them all]–your leaders who are over you in the Lord and those who warn and kindly reprove and exhort you.

¹³And hold them in very high and most affectionate esteem in [intelligent and sympathetic] appreciation of their work. Be at peace among yourselves.

¹⁴And we earnestly beseech you, brethren, admonish (warn and seriously advise) those who are out of line [the loafers, the disorderly, and the unruly]; encourage the timid and fainthearted, help and give your support to the weak souls, [and] be very patient with everybody [always keeping your temper].

¹⁵See that none of you repays another with evil for evil, but always aim to show kindness and seek to do good to one another and to everybody.

¹⁶Be happy [in your faith] and rejoice and be glad-hearted continually (always);

¹⁷Be unceasing in prayer [praying perseveringly];

¹⁸Thank [God] in everything [no matter what the circumstances may be, be thankful and give thanks], for this is the will of God for you [who are] in Christ Jesus [the Revealer and Mediator of that will].

¹⁹Do not quench (suppress or subdue) the [Holy] Spirit;

²⁰Do not spurn the gifts and utterances of the prophets [do not depreciate prophetic revelations nor despise inspired instruction or exhortation or warning].

²¹But test and prove all things [until you can recognize] what is good; [to that] hold fast.

²²Abstain from evil [shrink from it and keep aloof from it] in whatever form or whatever kind it may be.

²³And may the God of peace Himself sanctify you through and through [separate you from profane things, make you pure and wholly consecrated to God]; and may your spirit and soul and body be preserved sound and complete [and found] blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ (the Messiah).

²⁴Faithful is He Who is calling you [to Himself] and utterly trustworthy, and He will also do it [fulfill His call by hallowing and keeping you].

²⁵Brethren, pray for us.

²⁶Greet all the brethren with a sacred kiss.

²⁷I solemnly charge you [in the name of] the Lord to have this letter read before all the brethren.

²⁸The grace (the unmerited favor and blessings) of our Lord Jesus Christ (the Messiah) be with you all. Amen, (so be it).

As I sit here and read this, it causes me to examine myself… again.  :)  Isn’t the Word of God like that?  Constantly peeling back the layers we have built up around us… going deep to the heart, where it caresses or pierces at our inner most being.

I feel at a loss for more words … I just need to go and talk with my Jesus!

… “The grace (the unmerited favor and blessings) of our Lord Jesus Christ (the Messiah) be with you all. Amen, (so be it).”

The Bible has many scriptures, especially when you read from the KJV, that are poetic, and unless we take time (individually - ourselves) to study them out… we may miss their real meaning.  One scripture I have heard over and over, always thinking I fully understood the meaning… but WOW,  Today in prayer, I began to feel the need to study it.  I’m so thankful I did!

“The wind bloweth where it listeth, and thou hearest the sound thereof, but canst not tell whence it cometh, and whither it goeth: so is every one that is born of the Spirit.” KJV

The wind (pneuma - Christ’s spirit, the Holy Spirit) bloweth (pneo - to breath) where it listeth (thelo - to will, be resolved, to desire), and thou hearest (akouo - to hear, to attend, be noised, be reported) the sound (phone - a sound, tone, musical instrument, a voice, a sound of uttered words, speech, of a language, tongue) thereof, but canst not tell whence it cometh, and whither it goeth: so (houto - in this way, in like manner) is (esti - to be, come, must need) everyone (pas - all, any every) that is born (gennao - to be born, begotten) of (ek - after, out of, from, by) the Spirit (pneuma - Christ’s spirit, the Holy Spirit).

The other morning, I was reading in the book of 1 Kings, where Solomon begins his rule and how that God allows him to build the House of the Lord.

In 1 Kings 3 :5-15, God said unto Solomon, “Ask what I shall give thee.” Solomon asked for an understanding heart to discern judgment.

1 Kings 4:30 “And Solomon’s wisdom excelled the wisdom of all the children of the east country, and all the wisdom of Egypt.”

I Kings 6:11-13, “And the word of the LORD came to Solomon, saying, Concerning this house which thou art in building, if thou wilt walk in my statutes, and execute my judgments, and keep all my commandments to walk in them; then will I perform my word with thee, which I spake unto David thy father:  And I will dwell among the children of Israel, and will not forsake my people Israel.”

Then in 1 Kings 8 Solomon blesses the Lord, and blesses the newly built house of the Lord.

I Kings 9:2-7,  “That the LORD appeared to Solomon the second time, as he had appeared unto him at Gibeon.  And the LORD said unto him, I have heard thy prayer and thy supplication, that thou hast made before me: I have hallowed this house, which thou hast built, to put my name there for ever; and mine eyes and mine heart shall be there perpetually.  And if thou wilt walk before me, as David thy father walked, in integrity of heart, and in uprightness, to do according to all that I have commanded thee, and wilt keep my statutes and my judgments:  Then I will establish the throne of thy kingdom upon Israel for ever, as I promised to David thy father, saying, There shall not fail thee a man upon the throne of Israel.  But if ye shall at all turn from following me, ye or your children, and will not keep my commandments and my statutes which I have set before you, but go and serve other gods, and worship them:  Then will I cut off Israel out of the land which I have given them; and this house, which I have hallowed for my name, will I cast out of my sight; and Israel shall be a proverb and a byword among all people:”

As I was reading this, I began to think about how Solomon was considered such a wise king… but his wisdom didn’t save him, or even keep him from making wrong choices in his own life.  Twice, God appeared to him to let him know that He (God) would bless His house and the children of Israel… if they would only do as He asked.  You would think that in all that wisdom, he would have understood that.  But after reading chapter 11, verse 4 … you see that there is a vital difference between him and his father, David.  “The heart.”

1 Kings 11:4, “For it came to pass, when Solomon was old, that his wives turned away his heart after other gods: and his heart was not perfect with the LORD his God, as was the heart of David his father.”

I think at times we become so caught up in finding wisdom in situations that we get to the point where we loose our “Heart.”  We focus so much on the next step and the direction we are supposed to be heading, that we don’t enjoy the moment we are in, and praise God for what He is doing, and has already done. We don’t just magnify and glorify God for who He is!

This last weekend has been another building block in my life.  We had our Michigan Matters Ministry Training Conference, and I found some answers to questions that had been taunting my mind.  I found a renewed certainty… God is with me.

Seeing such a anointing of God in our services, and the desire that Michigan has for reaching souls… and then we attended the “How Sweet The Sound” Finale in Detroit, where there was a spectacular outpouring of the anointing of God.  To the point where I stopped, raised my hands and felt my soul cry out… “This is MY God! This is Who I serve, There is NO Doubt!”   It was such an amazing experience, to see the FIRE from Heaven fall in that arena, that my soul cried out to magnify and glorify HIM.  My feelings were not to disregard someone else’s faith in God, but to affirm my own.

Wisdom is needed, knowledge is needed… but it has to be hand and hand with Heart.  And if I had one without the other, I would want the Heart after God…because my faith in Him would bring about direction.  I don’t want to be like Solomon, where I had so much wisdom, but couldn’t follow after God.  He built the House of the Lord, but also built temples for other gods for his many wives.

How do we get there?  How do we get from building the House of the Lord (our temple - given to God) to a point where we settle for building other temples here and there…. pushing down the walls of the once sacred and holy place in our life?  We all want knowledge and understanding, but what good will they do if our “Heart” is not fixed upon God.

When Solomon blessed the House of the Lord, his heart could very well have been in tune with God.  I believe that it probably was, but I also see that God warned him of the choices that stood before him.  That there would probably come a time when there would be a choice… Every day, we need to take time to acknowledge God’s place in our heart.  The longer we take between those moments, the farther we get from Him… is that how Solomon found himself building houses for other gods?  He began to spend more time with all his wives and their gods, that he eventually pushed the ONE TRUE God out of his life completely?

I don’t know about you, but I want to make the right choices.  I want to have wisdom in my dealings … and I believe that will come with having a “Heart” like the Heart of David… one that is perfect with the Lord!

Today, for me, this passage from I Chronicles 29:10-18 says it all…

¹⁰Wherefore David blessed the LORD before all the congregation: and David said, Blessed be thou, LORD God of Israel our father, for ever and ever.
¹¹Thine, O LORD is the greatness, and the power, and the glory, and the victory, and the majesty: for all that is in the heaven and in the earth is thine; thine is the kingdom, O LORD, and thou art exalted as head above all.
¹²Both riches and honour come of thee, and thou reignest over all; and in thine hand is power and might; and in thine hand it is to make great, and to give strength unto all.
¹³Now therefore, our God, we thank thee, and praise thy glorious name.
¹⁴But who am I, and what is my people, that we should be able to offer so willingly after this sort? for all things come of thee, and of thine own have we given thee.
¹⁵For we are strangers before thee, and sojourners, as were all our fathers: our days on the earth are as a shadow, and there is none abiding.
¹⁶O LORD our God, all this store that we have prepared to build thee an house for thine holy name cometh of thine hand, and is all thine own.
¹⁷I know also, my God, that thou triest the heart, and hast pleasure in uprightness. As for me, in the uprightness of mine heart I have willingly offered all these things: and now have I seen with joy thy people, which are present here, to offer willingly unto thee.
¹⁸O LORD God of Abraham, Isaac, and of Israel, our fathers, keep this for ever in the imagination of the thoughts of the heart of thy people, and prepare their heart unto thee:

David had such a way with words.  Many times my words fail me… so, today my words are taken from this passage, which exalts God, lifts high His Name, and requests a look at my heart…  Lord, prepare me!

Have you ever talked with someone, or should I say listened to someone, who takes over a conversation?  You try to say something, but either get cut-off, or they just keep going on and on and on?  It is like all they want to do is be heard, and it doesn’t matter who they are talking too… just that they are talking?

I have a daughter that is 11 going on 12 and she loves to talk.  Amongst the constant talking there are nuggets of information about her life, but sometimes I miss it because she is always talking… and after a while, I tune out the chatter.  It isn’t something I intentionally do, but often find myself asking, “What did she just say?”  And at times she will be so focused on what she wants to say, that when I do get to respond… it is never heard.  It could be that I am asking her to do something, or replying to a question she has… and within minutes she will either have to be told again what to do, or I’m answering the same question that was just asked.  Sometimes, we will see the same thing happen, and she will repeat it about 5 times… to make sure that I knew it happened.  I saw it too!  I knew it happened! I understand that a lot of this is a girl thing… the mind racing from one thing to another so quickly that you feel you need to get it all out.

But… as I was praying this morning, I found myself asking, “Who is leading my conversation with God?  Him or me?  More times than not, I think it is me.  I have so much to say, doesn’t He want to know it all?  I had this happen or that happen (which He already knows) and I need to tell Him how I feel about it (which He already knows).  I have so many requests and I need to remind Him about them all.  When I am finished… Have I allowed Him to say anything?  Did I lead our conversation?

Interestingly enough, as I was looking for scripture references from the concordance in the back of my Bible, I couldn’t find the word “Listen.”  And when I looked for “Hear”, all the references were … guess?!  How God hears our prayers!  Wow.  Such selfish people we are!  But as I was reading Psalms 143, I went passed the referenced scripture where David is saying, “Hear me,” to him saying, “Cause me to hear…”  Isn’t it crazy that my Bible concordance forgot to add the scriptures references about listening and hearing from God?

Psalms 143 says,  ^“1Hear my prayer, O LORD, give ear to my supplications: in thy faithfulness answer me, and in thy righteousness. ²And enter not into judgment with thy servant: for in thy sight shall no man living be justified. ³For the enemy hath persecuted my soul; he hath smitten my life down to the ground; he hath made me to dwell in darkness, as those that have been long dead. ⁴Therefore is my spirit overwhelmed within me; my heart within me is desolate.  ⁵I remember the days of old; I meditate on all thy works; I muse on the work of thy hands. ⁶I stretch forth my hands unto thee: my soul thirsteth after thee, as a thirsty land. Selah. ⁷Hear me speedily, O LORD: my spirit faileth: hide not thy face from me, lest I be like unto them that go down into the pit.⁸Cause me to hear thy lovingkindness in the morning; for in thee do I trust: cause me to know the way wherein I should walk; for I lift up my soul unto thee. ⁹Deliver me, O LORD, from mine enemies: I flee unto thee to hide me. ¹⁰Teach me to do thy will; for thou art my God: thy spirit is good; lead me into the land of uprightness. ¹¹Quicken me, O LORD, for thy name’s sake: for thy righteousness’ sake bring my soul out of trouble. ¹²And of thy mercy cut off mine enemies, and destroy all them that afflict my soul: for I am thy servant.”

In this Psalm, David did let God know how he was feeling, and he did petition God… but he left room for God to respond when he told God how his soul was thirsty for Him, then said, “Cause me to hear… and cause me to know…”  Both of these statements are seeking God’s advise, and acknowledging that He wanted to hear from His God.  And then, “Lord, teach me… and Quicken me.”  They were all types of requests, but showed us that David wanted to allow God to lead him.

I don’t know about you, but I want God to lead our conversations.  I want to listen when he decides to speak, I want to feel the nudging of His spirit and allow Him to change the direction of my prayers if it is His will.

Take time and think about this… Who is leading your conversation?